100 Words On Top Gun, Eddie Murphy, The Raid and O.G. Spielberg

Spielberg recently emphasised why he’s bringing the original versions of E.T. and Raiders of the Lost Ark to Blu-ray instead of the “enhanced” versions. Here’s a loose interpretation of his announcement:

“For myself, I tried [changing a film] once and lived to regret it. Not because of fan outrage, but because I was disappointed in myself. […] If I put just one cut of E.T. on Blu-ray and it was the 1982 [version], would anyone object to that? [The crowd yells “NO!” in unison.] OK, so be it. [And George Lucas can suck it.] [The crowd yells “YES!” in unison.]”

Synecdoche, New York

Being a Charlie Kaufmann fanatic, I had to watch his directorial debut film about a theatre director attempting to recreate New York for an upcoming play. The word “Synecdoche” is a figure of speech: a part being used for the whole or vise versa. That definition plays in with the themes Kaufmann addresses surrounding existence and relevance. In the screenwriter’s typical fashion, the movie’s a magnificent mind molester complimented by a typically brilliant should’ve-been-nominated-for-another-Oscar performance from Phillip Seymour Hoffman. Too bad Spike Jonze couldn’t helm it, for it’s missing the clarity and personality that could’ve pushed it into legendary status.

Jack McGee

In the centre of the circle of what’s-his-face actors is Jack McGee. From his TV stints (SVU, NCIS and a damn fine role in Rescue Me) to big-screen bit roles (Crash, Tron: Legacy), McGee leaves an oddly memorable presence. Perhaps it’s his relatable everyman persona or his adorable bulldog mug. Either way, he’s a quality actor that will hardly get any attention beyond this obscure blog post. It did my heart good to see him in The Fighter playing a more prominent role. He’s kinda like that red-faced uncle you only ever see during Christmas (he usually starts the arguments).

The Raid trailer

So I was chilling with John Woo the other day, snorting some coke, when I was like “Hey John, what was the last awesome shoot-’em-up movie you saw?” He said “The Expendables.” Then I replied “I thought that was kinda shit, actually.” He yelled “You better take that back!” I screamed “Never!” He then released some doves, we drew our firearms (pointed fingers) and scrapped it out for half an hour. Once the cocaine wore off, we watched this trailer, collapsed in each others arms and wept in utter delight at the sheer beauty of this relentless Indonesian action film.

Anne Hathaway

Oh Anne Hathaway, I wish I could fall in love with you and your big anime eyes. As much charm as you have in films I would otherwise despise, I find it hard to forgive you for Bride Wars. I expected that kind of shit from Kate Hudson, but not you. I do admit however, that the thought of you in a Catwoman costume brings me to inner peace like a purvey Dalai Lama. But then you had to go ahead and sign on to the most inane romantic comedy since The Ugly Truth. I’ll blame the Oscars’ on Franco.

The Mysterious Geographical Adventures Of Jasper Morello

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vORsKyopHyM

Don’t let the syllable-heavy title discourage you. This Oscar nominated Aussie short film is a grim, twisted and fan-flippin’-tastic tale of a navigator assigned to help a crew search for a cure to a fatal disease that has plagued their land. While the plot is pretty much the vital segment of a bigger implicit story, it’s the magnificent art direction that colours you impressed. If you can’t be bothered watching the half hour clip above, think of it as paper cut-out shadow puppetry…
detailing a steam punk industrial…
Starship Troopers
H. R. Giger-esque…
Screw it. Just watch the damn film.

Eddie Murphy

The Murph’s had a career of two halves. He started with a string of hilariously awesome flicks like 48 Hours and Beverly Hills Cop. He then followed those up with unhilariously not-awesome flicks like Pluto Nash, Meet Dave and the fuck-my-eyes awful Norbit. To his credit, he pulled of a pretty admirable performance in Dreamgirls, plus his voice work in the Shrek films are top tier (even though the third was sorta kinda terrible). So, what’s next? Personally, I reckon he should put his pride to the side and do a self-centred mockumentary biopic, JCVD style. Just no fat suits.

Why I Haven’t Seen Top Gun

I’m not into planes, or the air force, or Tom Cruise, so I’m not sure what’s left to entice me into watching this supposedly classic mid-80s action flick aside from Danger Zone (that song kicks ass). I keep hearing things about unintentionally hilarious homo-erotic undertones between the lead (Cruise) and Val Kilmer (before he started his whales-for-breakfast diet). As tempting as it is to catch such biding sexual tension in 3D, I think I can safely die without having this film on my movie-viewing résumé. Besides, I’ve seen Hot Shots, so I’m covered (that’s the movie Top Gun parodies, right?).